17 Ways to Regulate Your Nervous System: Shifting from Triggers to "Glimmers"

Feeling frazzled or numb? Learn how to shift from "survival mode" to safety using 17 simple nervous system regulation tools. It's time to turn triggers into glimmers and reclaim your peace.

Have you ever had one of those days where you feel like a literal walking raw nerve? You know the feeling: a "we need to talk" text makes your heart race, a loud noise makes you jump out of your skin, or maybe you just feel... heavy. Like you’re moving through molasses and can’t seem to find your "spark."

Wanna hear some good news? You aren’t "broken" or "too sensitive." Your nervous system is just doing its job; it’s trying to keep you safe! But sometimes, our internal alarm system gets a little too sensitive, and it starts ringing even when there’s no fire.

Today, we’re going to talk about how to turn that alarm down. We’re moving away from a life dictated by "triggers" and moving toward a life filled with "Glimmers." Ready to feel safe in your own body again? Let's dive in!

Understanding the "Survival Mode" Spectrum

Before we get to the "how," we have to understand the "why." (I know, I know—we want the tips! But trust me, understanding this makes the tips work better).

Most of us have heard of "Fight or Flight," but our nervous system is actually a lot more complex. According to Polyvagal Theory (which is a fancy way of describing how our vagus nerve controls our emotions), we generally hang out in three different states:

1. The Ventral Vagal State (The "Zen Zone")

This is where we want to be! In this state, you feel safe, connected, and social. You can think clearly, your digestion is working well, and you feel like you can handle whatever life throws at you. This is the home of "Glimmers."

2. The Sympathetic State (The "Freak-out Zone")

This is Fight or Flight. Your heart rate goes up, your breathing gets shallow, and you feel anxious or angry. Your body thinks a tiger is chasing you (even if it’s actually just a full inbox).

3. The Dorsal Vagal State (The "Checked-out Zone")

This is Freeze. When the "tiger" is too big to fight or run away from, your body shuts down to protect you. You might feel numb, depressed, unmotivated, or "foggy."

What is a "Glimmer"? (The Concept That Changed My Life)

We all know what a trigger is: it’s something that sends us spiraling into the Freak-out Zone or the Checked-out Zone. But have you heard of a Glimmer?

Coined by licensed clinical social worker Deb Dana, "Glimmers" are the opposite of triggers. They are tiny moments of safety, connection, or beauty that signal to your nervous system: "Hey, it’s okay. You’re safe right now."

A glimmer isn't a huge, life-changing event. It’s the way the sun hits your coffee mug in the morning. It’s the smell of clean laundry. It’s the feeling of a soft blanket or a smile from a stranger. When we start "hunting" for glimmers, we train our nervous system to find the Ventral Vagal state again.

17 Ways to Regulate Your Nervous System and Find Your Glimmers

Here are 17 actionable strategies to help you shift your state. I’ve categorized these so you can find exactly what you need, whether you’re feeling "high energy anxious" or "low energy numb."

Category 1: The "Immediate Reset" (Body-Based Tools)

1. The Physiological Sigh 

This is my absolute favorite "secret weapon." It’s a specific breathing pattern that tells your brain to lower your heart rate almost instantly.

• How to do it: Inhale deeply through your nose. Then, at the very top, take another tiny "sip" of air to fully expand your lungs. Exhale slowly through your mouth with a "sigh" sound. Repeat 3 times.

2. The Mammalian Dive Reflex (The Cold Water Splash) 

Am I the only one who hates cold water? (Seriously, I’m a warm-bath-only kind of girl). But science says that splashing ice-cold water on your face—specifically the area around your eyes and cheekbones—triggers a reflex that slows your heart rate and resets your nervous system.

• Pro Tip: If you don't want to ruin your makeup, grab an ice cube and hold it in your hand or run it along your jawline!

3. Humming, Chanting, or Singing 

Your vagus nerve passes right by your vocal cords. When you hum or sing, the vibration physically stimulates the nerve, moving you toward the "Zen Zone."

• The "Vu" Breath: Inhale, and on the exhale, make a deep, low "Vuuuuuuuuu" sound. Feel the vibration in your chest. It feels like a literal internal massage.

4. The Butterfly Hug 

This is a technique used in EMDR therapy to help process stress.

• How to do it: Cross your arms over your chest so your hands rest on your shoulders. Alternate tapping your hands—left, right, left, right—like the wings of a butterfly. This "bilateral stimulation" helps balance the two hemispheres of your brain.

Category 2: Shifting Out of "Freeze" (For when you feel numb)

5. Shaking it Off (Literally!) 

Have you ever noticed how a dog shakes after a stressful encounter? They are literally "shaking off" the excess adrenaline. If you feel "stuck" or heavy, stand up and shake your arms, your legs, and your whole body for 60 seconds. (I usually do this to a Taylor Swift song in my kitchen—no judgment!).

6. The 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Method 

When you’re stuck in your head, you need to get back into your senses.

• Find: 5 things you can see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste. This forces your brain to acknowledge the safety of your current environment.

7. Orienting 

When we are stressed, our vision narrows (tunnel vision). To signal safety, we need to show our brain that there are no threats in the room.

• How to do it: Very slowly, let your head turn from side to side. Look at the corners of the room. Notice the textures. Find one thing that looks "pleasant" to you.

8. Weighted Pressure 

If you feel like you’re "floating away" or disconnected, deep pressure can help ground you. This is why weighted blankets are so popular! If you don't have one, even a heavy pillow or a pet sitting on your lap can help your body feel "contained."

Category 3: Sensory Glimmer Hunting

9. Nature Gazing 

Fractals (complex patterns found in nature, like the veins on a leaf or the way a tree branches) have a naturally calming effect on the human eye. Looking at greenery for just 40 seconds has been shown to improve focus and lower stress.

10. Scent Association 

Our sense of smell is the only sense directly linked to the emotional center of the brain (the amygdala).

• Strategy: Pick a "Glimmer Scent"—maybe it's lavender, peppermint, or even a specific perfume. Only use it when you are feeling calm and happy. Eventually, your brain will associate that smell with safety, and you can use it to "trigger" a calm state when you're stressed.

11. The Power of "Awe" 

Psychologists have found that "Awe" is one of the most powerful emotions for regulating the nervous system. Looking at a sunset, watching a "Life on Earth" documentary, or looking at photos of the cosmos can make our problems feel smaller and more manageable.

Category 4: Environmental & Social Safety

12. Co-Regulation (The Power of Connection) 

Humans are social creatures. Sometimes, we can't regulate ourselves alone.

• Strategy: Call that one friend who makes you feel "at home." Or, if you’re with a partner or a pet, ask for a long hug (at least 20 seconds). A 20-second hug releases oxytocin, the "cuddle hormone," which shuts down the stress response.

Heading into a social event while feeling frazzled? Use The Introvert’s Emergency Kit to protect your energy and stay grounded.

13. Digital Boundaries 

Let's be real: scrolling through the news or TikTok can be a "trigger minefield."

• Strategy: Create a "digital sanctuary." Turn off non-human notifications (like news alerts or sales apps). Your nervous system doesn't need to know about a flash sale at 11 PM when it's trying to rest!

14. Creating a "Safe Haven" Visual 

If you can't physically leave a stressful situation, you can leave mentally.

• How to do it: Close your eyes and imagine a place where you feel 100% safe. Maybe it's a beach, a forest cabin, or your grandma's kitchen. Engage all five senses in your imagination. What do you hear? What does the air feel like? Spending 2 minutes here can shift your physiology.

Your external environment can be a massive Glimmer. Check out these 9 Stunning Home Decor Ideas to Elevate Your Space on a Budget to turn your home into a sensory sanctuary

Category 5: Mindset Shifts

15. Self-Compassion Talk 

Beating yourself up for being "too anxious" is like screaming at a fire alarm for going off. It doesn't help!

• Strategy: When you feel a trigger, say to yourself: "My body thinks I'm in danger right now, and it's trying to protect me. Thank you, body, but I am safe here." 

16. Identifying Your "Glimmer of the Day" 

Make it a game. Every evening, tell a partner or write in your journal one "Glimmer" you saw that day. The more you look for them, the more your brain "filters" for them. (It’s like when you buy a red car and suddenly you see red cars everywhere!).

17. The "No" Policy 

Sometimes, the best way to regulate your nervous system is to stop over-scheduling it. If an invitation or a task makes your stomach drop or your chest tighten, give yourself permission to say "No." Protecting your peace is a form of nervous system hygiene.

Why This Isn't Just "Self-Care" (The Deeper Why)

You might be thinking, "This sounds like a lot of work just to feel 'normal'." And I hear you! But here’s the thing: when our nervous system is regulated, everything gets easier.

• Your immunity improves (stress hormones like cortisol actually suppress your immune system!).

• Your digestion works better (you can’t "rest and digest" if you’re in "fight or flight").

• Your relationships flourish (you’re less likely to snap at your partner when you’re not in survival mode).

Regulation is the foundation of your dream life. You can’t build a beautiful house on a shaky foundation, and you can't build a beautiful life on a frazzled nervous system.

Your Step-by-Step "Nervous System Reset" Plan

If you’re feeling overwhelmed right now, don't try to do all 17 things! Just follow this simple 3-step path:

1) Stop and Check-In: Where are you on the spectrum? (Zen, Freak-out, or Checked-out?)

2) Pick One Body-Tool: If you're "Freak-out," try the Physiological Sigh. If you're "Checked-out," try Shaking it Off.

3) Find One Glimmer: Look around. Find one thing that is beautiful or safe right now. Hold your attention on it for 30 seconds.

How To Start Living a "Glimmer-Filled" Life

At the end of the day, regulating your nervous system isn't about never getting stressed again. That’s impossible! It’s about building the resilience to come back to center when life gets crazy. It’s about knowing that even in the middle of a "Trigger Storm," there is a "Glimmer" waiting to be found.

I want to hear from you—which of these 17 ways resonates with you the most? Have you ever experienced a "Glimmer"? Let me know in the comments below, and let’s support each other in this journey to a calmer, more beautiful life!

The 7-Day "Glimmer Glow-Up" Challenge

A step-by-step outline to help your readers integrate these 17 tools without feeling overwhelmed.

Day 1: The Breath Foundation

• The Goal: Master the "Physiological Sigh."

• The Task: Perform 3 sets of physiological sighs (double inhale, long exhale) three times today: once upon waking, once during a work break, and once before bed.

• Why: It’s the fastest way to prove to your brain that you are safe.

Day 2: Sensory Grounding

• The Goal: Get out of your head and into the room.

• The Task: Practice the 5-4-3-2-1 Method the moment you feel a "micro-trigger" (like a loud noise or a stressful email).

• Why: This interrupts the "Freak-out Zone" before it spirals.

Day 3: The Cold & Bold Reset

• The Goal: Use biology to your advantage.

• The Task: Try the Mammalian Dive Reflex (cold water splash) in the morning or a 60-second "Somatic Shake" in the afternoon.

• Why: This "shocks" the system out of a "Freeze" or "Dorsal Vagal" state.

Day 4: Environmental Glimmer Hunt

• The Goal: Train your eyes to see the "good."

• The Task: Take a 10-minute "Glimmer Walk." Your only job is to find 3 things in nature or your neighborhood that look beautiful or feel peaceful.

• Why: This builds the "Ventral Vagal" muscle of connection.

Day 5: Digital & Social Sanctuary

• The Goal: Protect your peace.

• The Task: Move your phone charger out of the bedroom and practice one form of Co-Regulation (a 20-second hug with a loved one or a pet).

• Why: Lowering external noise allows your internal system to settle.

If you find your phone is a major source of stress, mastering The 3:3:3 Rule: Master This 30-Day Dopamine Detox Guide can help reset your brain's reward system while you work on your nervous system.

Day 6: The Butterfly & The Brain

• The Goal: Balance your energy.

• The Task: Practice the Butterfly Hug for 2 minutes while visualizing your "Safe Haven."

• Why: This combines bilateral stimulation with mental imagery for a deep "safety" anchor.

Day 7: Integration & The Glimmer Journal

• The Goal: Make it a lifestyle.

• The Task: Write down your "Glimmer of the Week." Look back at which of the 17 tools felt the most natural to you and commit to using that as your "Go-To."

• Why: Reflection turns a one-time challenge into a permanent habit

The "Glimmer" Cliff Notes: 10 Key Takeaways

If you’re in a rush (or your nervous system is just feeling too frazzled to read the whole blog post right now—I get it!), here is the "spark-notes" version of everything we covered:

• Your Nervous System is a Protector, Not an Enemy: It isn't "broken" when you feel anxious; it’s just trying to keep you safe from perceived threats.

• The Three States: We move between the Zen Zone (safe), the Freak-out Zone (fight/flight), and the Checked-out Zone (freeze/numb).

• Triggers vs. Glimmers: While triggers signal danger, Glimmers are micro-moments that signal safety to your brain.

• The 30-Second Reset: Tools like the Physiological Sigh (double inhale, long exhale) can physically force your heart rate to slow down in seconds.

• Biological "Hacks": Splashing cold water on your face or humming can stimulate your Vagus Nerve to help you calm down faster.

• Get Out of Your Head: When you’re spiraling, use the 5-4-3-2-1 method to reconnect with your physical surroundings.

• The Power of Shaking: Animals shake to release stress, and we should too! A 60-second "dance-shake" can release pent-up adrenaline.

• Co-Regulation is Key: You don’t have to do it alone. A 20-second hug or a chat with a safe friend can "lend" your nervous system their calm.

• Nature is Medicine: Looking at trees or fractals for as little as 40 seconds can lower your stress levels.

• Consistency > Intensity: You don't need a 2-hour meditation. Small, daily check-ins and "glimmer hunts" build long-term resilience.

Frequently Asked Questions (The Stuff You’re Probably Wondering)

1. How long does it actually take to regulate my nervous system? 

It depends! Using a tool like the Physiological Sigh can work in under a minute. However, if you’ve been in "survival mode" for years, it takes time to train your body to feel safe consistently. Think of it like going to the gym for your brain—consistency is the secret sauce!

2. Can I do these exercises in public without looking weird? 

Absolutely! The Physiological Sigh just looks like a deep breath, and Orienting just looks like you’re admiring the room. If you’re feeling a "freeze" state, you can even do the Butterfly Hug by subtly crossing your arms and tapping your thighs.

3. What if I can’t find any "Glimmers"? 

On really hard days, glimmers can feel invisible. Start micro-small. Is the texture of your shirt soft? Is there a tiny patch of blue sky? A glimmer doesn't have to be "happy"—it just has to be "safe."

4. Is nervous system regulation the same as "just relaxing"? 

Not quite! Relaxing is a state, but regulation is a skill. It’s about having the tools to move between states. Sometimes, regulation means increasing your energy (like shaking) so you can eventually get to a place of rest.

5. Why do I feel more tired after I start practicing these tools? 

This is actually a good sign! It’s called "functional freeze." When your body finally stops running on adrenaline and "Fight or Flight," it realizes how exhausted it actually is. Listen to your body and give it the rest it’s asking for.

Wrapping It Up: Your Journey to Calm (and All the Glimmers in Between)

At the end of the day, your nervous system is the home you live in every single second. It deserves to be a place of peace, not a battlefield. I know that when you’re deep in the "Freak-out Zone," it feels like you’ll be stuck there forever, but I promise you, you won’t. By learning to hunt for glimmers and using these 17 strategies, you’re not just "calming down"; you’re literally rewriting the story of how your body experiences the world.

Remember, this isn’t about being a "zen monk" who never gets stressed (let’s be real, I still get heart palpitations when I see a "no-caller ID" phone call!). It’s about building that resilience so that when the triggers happen, you have a toolkit ready to bring you back home to yourself.

Be patient with your beautiful, hard-working body. It’s been trying to protect you for a long time, and it might take a minute for it to realize that it can finally let its guard down. Celebrate every tiny win; even if your only win today was taking one single "Physiological Sigh." That is progress, and progress is everything!

I am so incredibly proud of you for taking this step toward your own well-being. You deserve to feel safe, you deserve to feel grounded, and you deserve a life filled with so many glimmers that the triggers start to feel like a distant memory.

Can’t wait to see you crushing this challenge!

Now, I want to hear from you! Let's start a 'Glimmer Chain' in the comments. 

What is one tiny, beautiful thing that made you feel safe or happy today? It could be as simple as the perfect temperature of your coffee or a song that made you want to dance. 

I’ll be hopping in to reply to as many as I can—let's flood the comments with some good vibes! 👇